Panera = Boat Loads of Women

I met Troy for lunch today and he said I could pick where we would eat. After many, many hours of pondering and weighing the pros and cons, I decided on Panera. In case you can't read my sarcasm, I was being facetious. Panera is one of my favorite places to eat when you want a quick bite. I love how cozy it is in there and I love soup since I am really an eighty-three-year-old woman living in a twenty-seven-year-old's body. Panera is not one of Troy's favorite places, but he doth not protest too much when I suggest it. He does have a theory about Panera though which makes him wary to enter . . . chicks love Panera.

That's the theory. That only women and the men they drag there eat at Panera Bread Co. I thought this was ridiculous until I looked around the eight-by-ten square foot part of the restaurant we were eating in. There were approximately twenty five people in that section. Three of them were men, and one of them was Troy. That is crazy! Troy said when he was in line to order, there were about fifteen people - two men, one being himself. All the men that I saw there were accompanied by a woman, and it didn't look like a minor coffee date. It was obvious these men were in committed relationships.

Troy's theory holds a lot of water. For starters, I love Panera and I also happen to be a woman. Interesting. Many of my friends love Panera too. They coincidentally share my gender as well. I went to Panera's website and wanted to learn a little more about them to see why this theory seems to be true. In the 'About Us' section there is a paragraph describing who Panera Bread is. Let me write this out for you:

We are Panera. We are bakers of bread. We are fresh from the oven. We are a symbol of warmth and welcome. We are a simple pleasure, honest and genuine. We are a life story told over dinner. We are a long lunch with an old friend. We are your weekday morning ritual. We are the kindest gesture of neighbors. We are home. We are family. We are friends.

If this isn't written for a woman, than I'll shave my head and walk backwards. This is foreplay for women. Plain and simple. Everything about that paragraph is appealing to me. Reading that makes me want to go back to that place for dinner and then hope I get invited for a sleepover. I feel like I know who the real Panera is. I mean, I think I am ready for an intimate relationship with Panera Bread.

Now, when Troy reads Panera's bait for women (also known as the 'About Us' section), he is going to laugh the laugh he uses when he reads something that he thinks is completely ridiculous. Let's be honest, if I wasn't so blinded with my love for Panera, I would think the same thing. If I wasn't completely head over heels for Panera, I would think that paragraph was written by a forty-five year-old cheeseball who might still live at home with his mom. Alas, I my love for Panera is to strong.

There is a one wrench that needs to be thrown into the mix to fairly test this theory. Troy does go to Panera often with two of his guy friends. They meet there pretty regularly. As part of my research, I asked if he really likes to the food. He said it was okay, but really they just meet there because it is centrally located and there are more vegetarian options for one of the dudes. Interesting.

I still need to do more research on this topic, but I have to say, judging by what I saw this afternoon, I can't say that Troy's theory is wrong. What we need to do now is harness this powerful knowledge. All you single fellas out there . . . get your butts over to your local Panera Bread Co and pick up a lady friend today! Apparently that is the female watering hole. Might as well take advantage of it.

Awesome Things Thought by Pam

One of my favorite blogs to follow is called 1000 Awesome Things. My friend, Kelsey introduced it to me. Every day, it lists something new that is, well . . . awesome. They can range from being the only person on the beach, to picking things up with your feet. It is definitely right up my alley and almost every time I read it, I think to myself, 'Yeah, that really is awesome!' I thought I would piggy back off of that blog and jot down a few things that are worthy enough to be Awesome Things Thought by Pam. I feel like I should tell you too that I have really put some good thought in this blog, as I have added to it over several days to make sure I have included really awesome stuff. If that doesn't scream commitment to my ten fans, I don't know what does.

1. Rain and Overpasses. I love it when you are driving in the middle of a rainstorm and the windshield wipers are cruising back and forth in their rhythmic dance. You start to wonder how hard the rain really is coming down because you are driving fast. Then you get to an overpass and for three glorious seconds everything is calm and quiet. Your windshield wipers are finally able to catch up with their work. You see how hard those droplets are flinging themselves toward the ground while you are in the brief safety of the overpass. Things move in slow motion. And then you drive through your cover back into the storm and the noise. I love those three seconds of stillness.

2. Fresh Cut Flowers. Most men think these are a big, fat waste of money . . . men like my husband. And I can see his point. They live for a short amount of time and then you have to throw them away. But most women see them as a chivalrous gesture that means that at one point during your man's day, you were on his mind and so much so that he thought to buy something for you that was completely for your enjoyment only. When Troy buys me flowers, I really make the most of it. I carry that vase into whichever room I'm in. Most of the day, they live on our dining room table because that is where the majority of the action is. But I have brought them into the kitchen on occasion to look at them while I'm cooking and also carried them into our spare bedroom if I am reading. Then, every night, I clutch that vase and trod upstairs to our room where they spend the night on our nightstand. I just think they are so cheerful.

3. Hugs. This one might surprise some of you who know me well because I am not a touchy-feely person . . . well, just not with anyone. I am a choosy-touchy-feely person. My friends in high school would tease me about my "side hugs," (where I would only extend out one arm and only our hips would touch) and they would sometimes demand a "full hug." But I can't deny that sometimes, all you need is a good hug from someone you care about. Troy knows this is therapeutic for me and now knows the routine, but when we were first married, I would tell him I needed a hug and he would hold me for a normal amount of time and start to pull away. Sometimes you need to biggie-size that hug, and I would tell him that I needed more time. Now, he waits for me to get my hug-fix. Sometimes you need a mom hug. Or a friend hug. Or a cat hug. Sometimes I feel like a lame-o asking for hugs, but I've never been rejected so far. Probably because I have only asked a select few of you. No offense to those who have not been asked. Maybe your turn is soon. Keep your fingers crossed!

4. Bonus Soups or Salads. Isn't it the best when you go to a restaurant, order your meal and find out via the menu or your server that your meal includes a soup or salad? It is like free food, even though I am sure that iceberg lettuce is included in the price. I love that! Maybe that is one of the reasons why I love Olive Garden so much. Umm, yes, I'll choose the soup, thank you - zuppa tuscana please - and keep those bread sticks coming! Now, this could mean that I don't go to "fancy" restaurants enough or I am just easily amused and judging by this blog and the fact that I know myself, I think it's the later.

5. Hotel Rooms and Husbands. I remember on our wedding night when Troy and I got to our hotel and were checking in. I am embarrassed to say that I purposely put my hands on the counter top so that the woman would know (if she were to see my ring) that we were married, so it was totally okay for her to allow these two, young wipper-snappers to co-habit in a hotel room. I am sure she appreciated my thoughtfulness to passively inform her because I bet my giant, white, wedding dress and Troy's crisp tuxedo didn't tip her off at all. Now, when we stay in hotels, sans wedding attire, I always feel little giddy and end up saying to Troy, "I'm in a hotel room with a boy!" I hope that never gets old.

6. New Shampoo. It doesn't matter what the shampoo promises you on its bottle. It doesn't matter if you bought it on sale, with a coupon, or on a whim. New shampoo is awesome and always the highlight of my next shower session. I am always convinced that this new addition to my grooming tactics makes my hair look shinier, straighter, curlier, or what-have-you. Plus, it has a different scent than your old shampoo, so when you flip your hair or turn your head quickly, you get a whiff and for a split second you think someone is following you too closely. Then you realize it's your new shampoo and you continue to strut your stuff.

7. Clapping in Unison. My sister-in-law, Tricia, was in a community theater play this summer. (She was captivating the role as Mrs. Bucket in Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.) After the show, the orchestra was playing the upbeat theme song while the actors were taking their bows. The audience was clapping randomly - until suddenly, the audience started clapping in unison with the beat of the music. It was awesome! It was almost like my hands found the rhythm before my head realized it. It felt like there was a sort of magic that fell over the whole audience and I thought to myself, I love this.

8. Closet 'NSYNC fans and Dances. Maybe you hate pop music. Maybe you think that Brittney, Jessica and Christina are really just blond vacuums whose voices are designed by a computer. Whatever your reason for hating the pop music scene, I have your number. You are the same people who run out to the dance floor when 'Bye, Bye, Bye' comes pumping through the speakers at the dance/wedding/party you're attending. Let's face it, everyone is a closet pop music fan, and it is almost the great music equalizer because it seems as though everybody knows the words and music of these teeny bopper idols. Any apprehensions are melted away and everyone dances and sings along. I love that. Of course tomorrow, the lines in the sand are drawn again, but for now, 'Oops! I Did it Again' and yes, I know the dance.

9. Singing when you don't know the words. I love it when I am in the car with someone and a song comes on that almost anyone who doesn't live in a cave would recognize, but there are some parts where you don't know all the words. You obviously still want to sing, but your voice gets a bit softer and you try to fake out some muffled syllables in hopes of fooling your friends, only to find out that they are doing the same thing!! A great example would be Benny and the Jets by Elton John. I don't think I know anyone who knows all the words. It usually goes something like "She's got electric boobs, a mow-hair zeus, you know I read it in a mag-ah-zee-eennn, oh, oh . . . ." And then everyone jumps in, "B-B-B-Benny and the Jetsssssss." I love that.

10. Back Scratches and Beauty Shops. Don't you love that feeling when someone starts to scratch your back? Your eye lids become heavy and the conversation gets hazy . . . you almost feel like you are going to melt. Or how about when someone plays with your hair? Oh my gosh, it's like the same feeling as getting your back scratched, but I swear, I get goosebumps on my head. I remember in my first grade class, the girls always played with each others hair and my teacher would tell us to 'stop with the beauty shop.' When I watch my students now, they still play with each others hair . . . and when I am lucky, sometimes mine! I have to say, it is EXTREMELY hard to tell the girls playing with my hair to get back to their school work. I usually let them play for a little bit . . . I mean, all work and no play, right?


So, there you go folks. Ten things that I think are awesome and I bet you will resonate with at least a couple of them. If you think of another awesome thing that you think people might not have pondered about, comment on this blog. When I get enough, I will post another blog about more awesome things with credit to you on the awesome thing you shared.