Dear Dunkin Donuts

Dear Dunkin Donuts,

As I sit on my couch this morning, I am savoring a cup of freshly brewed Dunkin Donuts coffee that my handsome husband so kindly purchased for me at CostCo. I am also being bombarded by the seemingly ubiquitous commercials that claim your franchises are close to my habitat. Alas, when I did a store search, I could not find a beloved DD within 50 miles. After I wept bitterly, I pulled myself together and did a little more soul searching. I found that there are plans of expanding your vast empire into the land of snow and cold that was perhaps overlooked due to its close proximity to Canada. 'Tis true, Minnesota is in fact part of the Midwest and we demand to be added to your 2,600 stores especially since you have infiltrated 30 countries. (Sigh . . . those lucky lands . . . )

Is it a crime that there are so many patrons who want to give you their money for a cup of your delicious, French Vanilla coffee with extra cream and two Splenda (that is a completely hypothetical coffee order)? Is it wrong that there are folks who have tasted the nectar of the gods and only desire to drink deeply from their coffee pots? I say nay!

So tease us no more with you coffee commericals! Give us a Dunkin Donuts store . . . . preferably on my way to work. America runs on Dunkin and I am an American!

Sincerely,
Pambo Jones