Torture of the Toes

Here we are. The first day of October. We are officially in Autumn. I love Fall. I love the changing of the colors, apple picking, pumpkin flavored everything, Halloween and Thanksgiving. Tell you what I don't love about Fall - shoes. Don't get me wrong, I LOVE shoes. I read that the average person has ten pairs of shoes . . . obviously they didn't poll me in that questionnaire because I would have skewed the data with my outlier answer. I actually don't know how many pairs of shoes I own because I am afraid of what the sum might be. But . . . my favorite kinds of shoes are sandals and when Fall comes and it is time to let the open-toed shoes hibernate for the winter, my feet don't like it.

Yesterday I wore a new pair of flats. **Side Note: They are super cute. Black, with tons of tiny sequins sewn all around them. Just in case you needed a visual.** By ten o'clock, my dogs were barking. I already needed to put band aids on my heels so I would be able to shuffle through the rest of the day. This is the part about Fall that I have a hard time adjusting to. I have all these cute flats to parade around in, but my feet are not happy about the new tenants. My toes cry out with every step, especially the big toes who are used to having all this lovely space and fresh air. My heels try to prepare for combat, but ultimately end up in the infirmary with battle wounds.

I dread this season of year time and again, for this very shoe reason. I know that I just need to plow through these next few weeks of discomfort and I do so by careful footwear planning. For example, I wear the shoes that I have not yet made a truce with on days I know I won't be walking all over Minneapolis. Or I might put a back up pair in my monstrous purse in case I can't take it anymore. But I am a prideful foot wearer and will endure this Chinese Water torture of the feet for longer than most people probably would and I will do so with little complaining. Why? Because nothing sucks the cuteness out of a pair of shoes like a whine session.

Maybe you are currently struggling with the same issue during this season too. I am here to bring comfort and encouragement to you, my blistered friends. Remember, these next few weeks are going to be awful, but by Thanksgiving, your enclosed shoes will love your feet and your feet with love them back . . . well, what's left of your feet anyway.

More Awesome Things Thought by Pam

Due to the intense popularity of the Awesome Things Thought by Pam, I have thought of a few more awesome things that you might also think are awesome. Therefore I have taken the time to type them out for your reading enjoyment. You're welcome.

1. Random, Perfect-Aim, Back Scratches. Have you ever sat next to a friend, your grandma or your mom and you feel that little twinge on the part of your back that is impossible to scratch? You know what's coming. It is going to get super itchy, really quick. Just when you are about to make the move to attempt to scratch it, the person next to reaches to scratch your back - in the exact spot you were attempting to aim! That's the best. My grandma is notorious for that. She is a really good back scratcher and she always seems to find that spot before I get to it, which is awesome. My friend Brooke is pretty notable for that too, although I have never told her so. I should probably do that.

2. Perforated Edges. Ticket stubs, legal pads, and check books have these fabulous, helpful edges. There is something really satisfying about ripping a piece of paper, in a perfect line due to the aid of those little holes punched in a row for your convenience. I have a really hard time not ripping paper with perforated edges, especially tickets. I remember going to sporting events before those fancy scanners were used. The service personal would rip the ticket but I always wanted to rip my own ticket. Those perforated edges have a spell on me. Not ripping a perforated edge is like not popping bubble wrap - impossible.

3. Humming Refrigerators. You are sitting at home after returning from work. You are too tired to turn on the TV. You plop down on the couch and let your brain unwind. After a few minutes, you realize that your house has a gentile humming that seems to be coming from the kitchen. It is the refrigerator. There is something calming about that hum. It's almost like a little lullaby that your appliance sings for you. I love that sound. I definitely associate that sound with being home and being cozy, therefore . . . awesomeness.

4. Coffee with Desert. I absolutely love fancy dinners. Whether it is a wedding, a rehearsal, a Christmas party, or a nice restaurant, I heart them all. I love enjoying a glass of wine or champagne. I love the appetizers and I love the main course but my favorite part is the desert. Not because I am a "sweets" person. To be honest, I prefer the appetizer because it is usually something salty and it means you still have the whole meal left to enjoy. I love the desert part because I always get coffee. I love having coffee with desert after a delicious meal. It almost feels like time slows down a little bit . . . but not too long because if I am sharing a desert with Troy, I need to eat quick!

5. Dry Underwear. Maybe you got caught in a rainstorm, or maybe you have been riding all the water rides at Great America, either way, you're soaked right down to your skivvies. You have to endure the ride home and after slipping out of your sloshed shoes, you take a nice hot shower, put on dry underwear and realize there is no greater feeling at that moment than dry fabric on your rump. You know what I'm talking about and it is glorious.

6. Greeting with a Kiss. Now, I know that I have stated before that I am not a touchy feely person, so this awesome thing does not apply to everyone. My apologies. But, we have a few friends who are consistent with their kiss greetings. Every time we see them, they hug both Troy and I, but give me a kiss on the cheek. I love it! It is very genuine and not at all creepy. It feels like we are in Italy and who wouldn't love that?

7. Loafers and Tassels. I love these. My grandpa used to wear these shoes a lot. You know the ones; the leather slip-on loafers with the two tassels on the top. They are great. They even make them for little boys. If I ever have boys, I am buying them and making my boys wear the tasseled loafers all the time. I secretly hope Troy will wear them some day.

8. Dogs Hanging out the Window. There have been days when I am feeling grouchy and I am on my way home from work or out running an errand. I have this gray cloud over my head, threatening to pour rain down right on my head. Then I see a dog with its head out the window, ears flapping in the breeze and just loving life. It makes me smile every time, even when I am in a rotten funk. I love how happy those dogs look with their big noggins hanging as far out the front window as possible.

9. Garlic/Onion Hands. My mom has a small silver soap bar. It's not real soap, but you are supposed to run water over your hands while rubbing this silver soap as though you were lathering up. Somehow it gets rid of the smell of onions or garlic on your hands. My mom swears by it. I do not own one of these because I love the smell of onions and garlic on my hands. I love how it stays there for two or three days, and sometimes, I purposely smell my hands during the day just to get a whiff. It smells like a good, home-cooked meal. How could you not love that?

10. Shoe Sounds. There are four specific noises that shoes make that I love. The first one is dress shoes on a tile floor. I love to wear my high heels and hear the click-clack sound on the tile. It makes me feel like a grown up. The second shoe sound I love is the squeaking noise that gym shoes make on the gym floor at a basketball game. Sometimes, I don't even listen to the announcer. I just listen to the squeaking. The third shoe sound I love it similar to the first: it is the sound of baseball cleats on the cement. I think it is for the same reason; I like the click-clack sound. They sound kind of like dress shoes. Finally, I love the sound of walking on gravel or leaves. There really isn't a reason, I just like it.

There you have it folks. More awesome things thought by me. I hope that you can identify with a few of them, and if you can't, I don't really care because the title of this blog is "Awesome Things Thought by Pam" not "Awesome Things Thought by (insert your name here)".