Minnesota Spring

Minnesota Spring

A Haiku

Dear Minnesota

It is officially Spring

Please stop sending snow

Imaginary Rock Star

Confession time: I am a rock star. Of course, when I am rocking out my music videos . . . what I really mean is, I am singing really loud . . . to the radio in the car . . . by myself. And I guess if we are being honest here . . . my recording studio is really just . . . my shower . . . when Troy's not home.

You might think I am popping some crazy pills over here, but I know for a fact that I am not the only one who does this. Who doesn't like to belt out their favorite song when they are alone in the car? And anyone can sound fantastic in the shower! I produce my best stuff in there! Seriously, the acoustics really are decent. Anyone who claims they have never done this had better have an extinguisher handy because his/her pants are on fire. Yeah, that's right, I'm calling you posers out!

Of course, singing alone is way less scary than singing in public. I am painfully shy when it comes to performing, and the thought of singing in front of people makes me want to barf. I took vocal lessons for a few years and there was a recital at the end of the semester. It was just me and a piano on a big stage in front of about fifty people. Of course, I am really critical of myself and one time after I sang my song, I walked right off the stage and made a bee-line for the ladies room where I bawled my eyes out because I was so embarrassed that I messed up on six notes. My parents recorded the performance for me, per my request, so I could study my singing "plays" like I was in the NFL. When I finally got the courage to watch it, I realized that I could really only hear three mistakes and my parents said they didn't hear any. But of course, they are my parents. The rules say they have to tell me that. Bless their little hearts.

So, long story short, when Troy went out with the guys and I went to run some errands, you better believe I was in my car singing my heart out winning over "my fans" with my melodious harmonies. **Side Note: Does anybody else have this strange sense of invisible security when they are in the car? Could this be the cause of our music videos? Another blog topic?** And when I went to take a shower, I was laying down some wicked-hot tracks which are sure to be overnight hits! My records are really hard to find in stores, but that's probably okay because I know you are too busy with your own music career in your car or shower. Hey, break a leg out there. Maybe our tour buses will meet up some time.

Intense Concentration

My grandparents like to read my blogs but they don't have internet so I format my "Nonsense" into a Word document, print them up and mail them out so my G.P.s can read them. If I am diligent about doing this every month, it doesn't take that long, but it is still a process because I have to reformat all the pictures.

I was working on just such a project this afternoon and while I was doing so I realized that my eyebrows were furrowed very intensely. I only realized this when my forehead started to feel fatigued. Of course my first thought was, "Relax! You don't want to get pre-mature wrinkles!" **Side Note: This is something I think about often since I was once an ignorant sun-worshiper in high school and now I am desperately trying to reverse the skin damage I am sure I created, thus the wrinkle-worry.** At my fearful command to myself, I would stop working, take a minute to do a few forehead stretches (Don't you love picturing me doing this? I bet I look ridiculous!) and continue on with my formatting, only to once again be interrupted by my intense forehead muscles contracting a mere few minutes later.

It made me think about how funny we can be when we are so engrossed in our work that we forget how our bodies respond to this attentiveness. I remember when I was in school and working intently on a writing assignment, I would tense up . . . my nose . . . I know it sounds weird, but I would. There was little third or fourth grade Pammie, hunched over her lined notebook paper, feverishly forming paragraphs and then the nose would start to feel tired. I think it's so weird, but also super interesting. Because of this, I try to notice what other people do when they are wrapped up in a project.

My dad also makes a profound, furrowed brow. My grandpa sticks his tongue out of the side of his mouth. My sister's action is my favorite though. You know she is so narrowly focused on your conversation when her mouth starts to form the words that you are saying. I love it. I think it's so funny. You might be animatedly sharing an exciting story and say the word, "wow!" and then Laura's countenance completely shifts. Her eyebrows rise and her mouth slowly forms the /o/ sound in "wow." Whenever she does this, I usually stop what I am talking about and point it out to her. Though I am usually teasing her, I really do find it endearing. It is such a fun quality to have.

We know that our bodies do things automatically without our need of cognitively telling our brains to perform this action. Breathing, heart pumping and blinking would be examples of this. But we forget the little things that our body language does in a similar fashion. Maybe you do some of things listed. Or maybe you have perfect and complete control over your body and don't. If the later is true, you are probably kind of weird. But don't worry, we can still be friends. If you do something that is funny, share it! I would like to know what weird things other people do. Mostly so I can feel more normal about myself.

Showering at Home

For those of you who don't know, we have been renovating our bathroom. Four months ago, we found a crack in the floor of our tub. After having a friend look at it and tell us that we needed to get that fixed like, yesterday, we thought we would have some time to figure out how we were going to fix the problem . . . until the very next day when we saw water damage in the ceiling of our kitchen. We immediately stopped showering at home and thus began the daily ritual of showering at our health club.

As we demolished our bathroom to the studs, we would gaze at the unfinished room and dream about the day we could shower at home again. Then we would grab our gym bags and drive to our showers. The funny thing is that as more time passed, the more showering at Lifetime became normal. We installed our new tub and tile, bead board and paint, and we would still dream about our finished bathroom, but we were not feeling the inconvenience as we had in the beginning. We had developed a new routine. We had new places of storing our personal care items and brushing our teeth and washing our faces in the kitchen sink was becoming more endearing than inconvenient.

Then the glorious day came when the bath fixtures were put in and the sink was connected to the water line. We could now not only shower at home, but use the sink upstairs too. It was so exciting that I literally giggled throughout my first shower and would shout out things to Troy like, "I am washing my hair in our shower right now!" or "I am using the loofah in our shower right now!" Sure, we were still missing things like the toilet and the last few pieces of trim, but who cares?! We can use the shower! It was fantastic.

However, this had created a need to make a new routine. I found myself standing in my almost completed bathroom with my towel wrapped around me, wondering what to do next. At the health club, I had my after shower routine and I had packed clean clothes in my gym bag. What do I do at home? I faced the same challenges in the morning. Where do I go to brush my teeth? Upstairs? Downstairs? One morning, I realized that I had actually put deodorant one twice because I lost my rhythm. (Sadly, this is completely true.) I suppose that is better than the alternative and rocking B.O. all day, but seriously, who does that?

It has been almost a week now of showering at home and I think I am starting to get the hang of it again. You'll know if I go into a relapse if I start packing my gym bag just to catch a hot shower. If that happens, I may need an intervention. Preferably in my beautiful bathroom because even though it's still feels kind of weird to shower at home, and it's not completely done yet, I really do love it!

Before

(Almost) After

Run-a-muck Thoughts

A few months ago, I met Troy for lunch at work. Instead of a friendly hello, he was greeted with a glum wife on the verge of tears. That morning I realized I had lost one of the little diamonds in my wedding band. It wasn't the fact that I had to get the small rock replaced, it was more of a sentimental feeling of loss that I was upset about. That ring is supposed to symbolize our unending love for each other and it was falling apart. (Deep, right?) Since I am a sentimental schmuck, this was upsetting to me.

Troy, being the fabulous husband that he is, swiftly took me to the jeweler to get it fixed and while there we learned that to avoid losing any more diamonds, I was going to have to get my engagement and wedding rings soldered. I really didn't want to do that. I had visions of my giving my rings to my children and though rings can also be un-soldered, it took away the tender vision. (Once again, reiterating that I am a sentimental schmuck.) I was also suffering from the sticker shock of the price to replace the diamond, re-tighten all the prongs and now the soldering, that I didn't want to pay to get my rings re-sized, per the recommendation of the jeweler because when the rings are together, it makes for a smaller size than the original ring.

For months now, I have been squeezing a size 4 1/2 ring on my size 5 finger. My finger hates this and often tries to rebel, by either holding my ring captive or not allowing it's passage. I decided that enough was enough. With my birthday being around the corner I concluded that for my birthday, I wanted to correct what I should have done months ago and re-size my ring. So, this was one of my many errands that I ran yesterday. For a day and a half now I have been ring-less, which I didn't think would be that big of a deal . . . until thoughts ran a-muck.

Here's my problem. I think to much and sometimes these thoughts run a-muck. Yes, that's right, a-muck. Like today when I was at the doctor's office with Troy. (He had laser eye surgery!) He has his wedding band resting proudly where it should be, while I am bare-fingered. My run-a-muck thoughts are thinking, "What if these people think I am his mistress? Maybe they think he is cheating on his wife with me!" Which, in actuality, wouldn't really be cheating, since in this scenario I am the wife and the hussy, but they don't know that. Another run-a-muck thought happened today at Target when I bought Olivia and Molly a new scratching post because they have annihilated the one my folks bought them. As I was in the check out lane, I wondered if the cashier was thinking, "Hmm, another single lady with cats . . . pathetic."

Thankfully, I came right home with no plans of venturing out tonight. Due in part to my new ring-less-phobia but mostly because Troy's still healing from his laser eye surgery. Number one errand on my list tomorrow is to get my rings back so I don't look like a crazy-cat-lady-home-wrecker.

Little Victories

Last night Troy and I went to the health club for a little swimming and . . . well, let's be honest . . . a hot shower. Lifetime always has someone manning the front desk and part of this person's job description is to welcome guests and also to bid a friendly farewell as they exit. For a while now, I have been playing a little game with these front desk people - unbeknown to them. The game is simple; I have to say "Goodbye" before they can say it to me. There are those few workers who are sneaky and get that "Have a good night" in there before I can even open my mouth. But many times I am victorious and in those cases, I turn to Troy and whisper, "I won!" and that, my friends, is one of life's little victories.

There are tons of them out there. Different victories are celebrated by different people. For example, Troy might tell you that one of his little victories is when the cats wait a whole hour to poop in the liter box after he has cleaned it. (I don't even know if that has even happened before.) This may not be one of yours. Especially if you do not have a cat. Important disclaimer: I am not talking about obvious victories, like being upgraded from coach to first class. I mean, that's a no brainier. Of course I want to sit in those giant, leather chairs and someone is getting me champagne while I fly the friendly skies, instead of sitting like sardines next to the woman with the screaming baby. I am talking about those little day-to-day things that happen that make you feel like a bona fide Charlie-Sheen-Winner. I bet if you dig deep, you can think of your own little victories, but if you are getting a little stuck, feel free to use one of mine listed below:

1. Beating the Lifetime workers at saying goodbye.
2. Fitting all the luggage in the trunk perfectly like a real-life Tetras game.
3. When pets/kids pick you to snuggle with.
4. Pulling into the gas station right when the low fuel light comes on.
5. Waking up on time even though you forgot to set your alarm.
6. Manipulating all the dirty dishes to fit in one dishwasher load.
7. Keeping plants alive.
8. When Olivia makes her "I'm going to barf"-meow and catching her in time to yak on the tile instead of the carpet.
9. When something is about to fall and you catch it midair with your mad reflex skills.
10. Thinking you spelled something wrong and when you go to check, you find out you're right.

I am sure that I could think of more, but ten is a nice round number so let's end there shall we? I hope you think of your own little victories and perchance even post them here to share! Go on, I double-dog-dare you.