Things that Annoy Me

Can I be honest with you here? I mean, we're all friends, right? This past month has been kinda rough on me. Because of this, I feel like I am in a crab mode, which is unusual because I am usually a cheerful lass who can pull herself up by the britches and put on a smile. Anyway, due to my lack of normal glee, I decided to write a blog about things that are annoying. Plus, this can be a fun game. One time, my sister and my friend, Geoff, came up to Minnesota to visit me while I was in college. On our way home to Chicago, we played the "I Hate" game. It is really simple. One person lists something that they hate . . . well, that is really the only direction. The funny thing is that the other two people would generally chime in with agreement. This game is actually very entertaining, though negative. It did however, keep us occupied until we got to the Illinois state line.

1. "Come on, give me a smile!" I really hate this. I'll be walking down the hall at my school - perfectly content with life - and someone will say, "Smile, Pam! It's not that bad!" I think to myself, I wasn't even in a crabby mood until you said that, but now I want to punch you in the baby maker. Just because I am not grinning a toothy grin 24/7, doesn't mean something is wrong. My relaxed face is apparently very menacing. Thank you for drawing attention to it.

2. Pro Athletes that are Ivy League Grads. This is so irritating to me. These meat heads get a scholarship to hump a pigskin ball and they don't even take any courses that would valuable for life. It is just a means to get to the NFL. Meanwhile, people like me study their butts off and drool over financial aid packages that we never see. Bears quarterback, Jay Culter went to Vanderbilt. You can't tell me he would get into that school on academics alone. Ugh . . . and he is dating Kristin Cavillari. But that is another blog for another time. **Side Note: While we are on the subject of Jay Culter, I also hate how he wears the helmet on his head like in this picture. Either keep it on, or carry it. You look like a darn fool.**

3. Futuristic "I told you so". When I was engaged and at my showers, I would always hear something along the lines of, "Oh, just wait until you are married, then you'll . . . . gain weight, not care about how you look, stop making home-cooked meals, etc." Now that I'm married, I hear, "Oh, just wait until you get pregnant, then you . . . . won't be able to tie your shoes, have to pee all the time, be sick for six months, etc.) You get the idea. I feel like I am being lectured for not living as long as these others who feel the need to rub future (and not always true) problems in my young face. Can I just have these life experiences when I am at that life stage, please?

4. Shaving, then Freezing. I shaved my legs today. After I finished showering, I turned off the water, opened the curtain and my legs immediately got goosebumps. Well, shaving was now a big, fat, waste of time. Awesome.

5. Interrupters. This is more of a pet peeve that turns into an extreme annoyance. It's like what I am saying is not important. My students do this all the time. I generally look and them and say, "I'm sorry, I think I was talking." Sassy? Yes. Effective? Sort of, but this offense will most definitely happen again. I am always surprised when adults have this bad habit. So frustrating. Maybe I should just start talking to them like I do to my students. Look out, I might bust out the sassiness on your interrupting souls!

6. Middle Seats and Men. Normally sitting in the middle of two men would be awesome. UNLESS you are on a plane. Then it stinks. This is because men like to sit spread-eagle and very rarely are you sitting next to someone who is good looking. The only time I am lucky enough to sit next to a hottie is when I fly with Troy. At least then I can ask him to try and close his knees a little so I can reach my backpack.

7. Cell Phones and the Gym. Do I even need to elaborate? If you are at the gym, leave your cell in your locker or in your car. Nobody wants to hear your conversation while you lazily move your legs on the elliptical, unsuccessfully pretending to work out.

8. Defective Carts. With out fail, every time I go to Target to do my weekly grocery shopping, I always seem to choose the cart that has an invisible boulder on one or more of the wheels. I know it's invisible because when I check the wheels, I can't find anything. Then I slowly push the cart forward as though the perpetrator might sneak out. I never find him. Then I give up and just go with it . . . but I hating it all the time. I think sometimes the wheels openly mock me.

9. When people pronounce the 's' in Illinois. It's silent, people.

10. Time left on the Microwave. This is more of an issue due to the fact that I am anal, but I am so annoyed when people use the microwave and they take their food out before the timer beeps and then they leave that time up there. They don't clear it out for the next person. I think it's so irritating. Similar to when you are at the gym and the meat heads don't take their monstrous weights off the bar. Clear it out for the next person!

Well, there you go. A few things that annoy me. Maybe some of my comments will resonate with you and together we can fight these annoyances. I will sign petitions, make posters, and talk to my congressman if it helps. But in all honestly, I'll probably be too lazy to do that. It's easier just to whine in a blog.