Negative Jokes

I love humor, but then again, who doesn't? When I am in a lousy mood, one big belly laugh usually does the trick to snap me out of my funk. I tend to be an equal opportunity aficionado of humor as well. I love a good dry sense of humor - especially if the comedian happens to be a grandpa, particularly my grandpa. Then I love it even more. I love what I call academic humor, where you need some educational experience to understand the pun or have an excellent memory from your sixth grade history class. I love cheesy jokes which require a groan after the punchline has been given. I love kids lame-o jokes because you know the kids think they are funny.

There is one kind of humor which I feel is not funny at all. These are the kind of jokes that require a fake laugh that sometimes I cannot even muster because of how I loath them . . . the negative jokes. The term "negative jokes" is really an overarching umbrella for all jokes that are the snarky or rudely sarcastic where the "comedian" thinks it is funny but they generally poke fun at someone. These jokes usually have a truthful undertone that allows the person telling to joke to say what they are really feeling in a way that would make the victim seem like a whiny baby if they called the person out on it. These jokes tend to be used by people who like to make themselves look good at the expense of someone else and the victim always ends up feeling foolish. I will sheepishly admit that I tend to be the butt of these negative jokes due to my naivety. It honestly really bothers me because if you know me, you know I am naive so I feel like it is a cheap shot.

Don't get me wrong. I love sarcasm. Love it. It is a part of my personality. I remember one time my youth group went on a retreat. The guest speaker was talking about sarcasm and how we need to be careful in how we use it. My youth pastor literally leaned forward in his chair and eyed each one of his sarcastic youth. We of course thought he was being sarcastic and saw his act as funny. In an effort to do research for this blog (you're welcome) I tried to refrain from any sarcasm. My goal was to do this for a whole day. I forgot for a split second and ending up failing before I even had breakfast. It doesn't help that Troy is a fan of sarcasm as well. 

I guess I am a little bit of a humor snob, but at least I am a snob who wants to promote good over evil. Negative jokes or making someone feel stupid is a big no-no in Friends 101. Now obviously, in our culture, it is natural to embrace some form of sarcasm. As long as you know the other people isn't serious, minor ribbing is okay. You can dabble in this kind of humor if you are with excellent friends who know you're joking and if this is not your go-to humor tactic.

Or if you are Troy and all of our guys friends we grew up with from church (yes, church). For some reason, those guys can rip on each other and still stand up in each others weddings. I honestly think that when one of the guys tells another that he throws like a girl, what they really mean, "I love you, man."

Humoring Your Humor

I am lucky enough to have a plethora of funny people around me. My husband for one, who does and says crazy things all the time, has on many occasion made me lose motor functions due to his antics. My sister, who is the only one who can understand me through my laughter, as she spits out one-liners left and right. I also know a handful of people at work who make me smile when I see them because I know something funny is just waiting to bust out of their lips.

Unfortunately, I also seem to be surrounded by a plethora of people who are not funny . . . but who think they are. These are the same people who lay out painfully dry comments with a look on their face that tells you that they are amused by their own comments. Good for you . . . because I am less than thrilled over here. There is one person who immediately comes to mind. His jokes are so bad that I have implemented the Three Laughs and You're Out Rule. The rule is simple. I will fake-laugh at three of his bad jokes. Then I'm done. Not even a snicker after that. Straight up . . . stone, cold, face. And I don't even feel bad. I already gave him three pity laughs. That's all I can do. Now he needs to take a hint. I'm not doing this guy any favors by encouraging the poor humor.

I have lately gotten a lot of jokes relating to our unfinished bathroom. You may or may not be aware of the fact that we are renovating our bathroom. Long story short, we had to replace the tub and decided to do a gut job for a better resale value. We ripped out our bathroom the Monday before Thanksgiving and have not been able to shower at home since that Sunday before. Thankfully we are members at Lifetime Fitness and have been showering there. However, when I mention to people that we haven't showered at home in almost three months, the big joke is, "They haven't showered in three months," followed by a long pause as though they are waiting for me to roar with laughter. If you are reading this and happen to be one of the people who have thought this comment was funny, don't feel bad, you're not the only one who thought this was a hilarious joke. You should know that this is a very weak joke. If your first response is similar to something that 80% of the population would want to say, come up with some new material.

This made me wonder if I might be a humor snob. However, this would be an appropriate time to mention that I am a huge fan of lame jokes - that is jokes that are meant to be lame. For example, jokes that my students tell me or a play on words. If someone called me today and asked me if my refrigerator was running and then told me to go chase it, I would probably keel over. Can I still be a humor snob if I laugh at something like that? The next thought that I had while pondering this idea was even more scary. What if people think that my jokes are lame. Maybe there are people out there who implement their own Three Strikes and You're Out Rule with me. But then I realized that I am fantastically witty and charming and the possibility of that being true is so slim that I would more likely be probed by aliens.