These past couple of months, I
have asked you to do more than just read the words in this blog. First, we
talked about identifying who God called you to be. I wanted you to make a list
of your skills and learn your spiritual gifts. I requested you to spend time in
prayer to earnestly seek your identity in Christ. Next, I challenged you to
bravely step into the role God set aside for you. We talked about how you are
good enough, strong enough, and grace-filled enough to fulfill a purpose that
God designed specifically for you. Now, I am asking you for one final action
and that is to choose peace with your God given role. The homework that I gave you over the course
of these past three months is a condensed version of a lesson that God had been
teaching me for almost three years.
Before I had children, I was
professionally driven. I was finishing up graduate school and had my five year
plan all set to go. I even had two teaching positions offered to me before I
even graduated. I thought that I was exactly where I needed to be. After all,
teaching and molding impressionable youth is important and Jesus loves the
little children too, so I thought I was golden. I felt that I was loving my
neighbor and serving my community through teaching. I also knew that time was
ticking for me to begin having a family, but I figured I could get a few years of
teaching in before that and then I would continue to teach since I could enjoy
my kids during my summers off. It was a good plan. It was a noble plan. It was
not God’s plan.
I came home one afternoon to find
my husband, Troy, already there. I figured he came home from work sick but he was
just sitting on the couch, waiting for me. He told me to come in and talk with
him - never a good sign. He had learned that day that his company’s accounting
team would be transferred to Cincinnati and we would be moving within the year.
This threw a wrench in my plans. All my teaching ties were in Minneapolis. What
was I going to do in a city where I didn’t know anyone? I tried to hit the ground
running. I researched hundreds of school districts and filled out many
applications as well, but I didn’t have any contacts. I was able to get a job
as a classroom aide, which was great because the teacher I worked with gave me
a lot of teaching freedom, but it wasn’t my own class – and my biological clock
was still ticking. I got pregnant that school year and was hopeful about
getting a teaching job in that school for the next year. I figured I was a
shoe-in, but once again, God had a plan that differed from my own.
After my son was born, I was home
on maternity leave and found out that I did not get the third grade position
for which I had applied and interviewed. I was crushed. But my principal told
me to be patient and that she felt confident a teaching position would open up
soon that would be a better fit for me, so I planned to come back the following
year as an aid again and bide my time.
A day or two after that dismal
phone call, Zachary was just two weeks old and we were sleeping in the converted
attic of our rented Cape Cod cottage when a large limb from the 150 year old
Beech tree fell on our house. Being from the upper Midwest, I initially thought
there was a tornado as I saw the roof and the wall rip apart. I ran to Zachary,
but with the damage being right by the stairs, I didn’t know how to escape. I
honestly thought I was going to die that morning and hoped that if I threw
myself over my baby, he might survive. Thankfully, both Zachary and I walked
away unscathed – not even a scratch on my feet as I walked barefoot through the
debris of broken glass and nails.
Needless to say, we moved. We got
out of our lease and went out to the suburbs where the commute to my job would
be a wash financially, so my husband and I decided I would stay home with
Zachary. While I loved being with my sweet boy, I was isolated and what’s
worse, I didn’t think I was making a difference – especially with kingdom work.
It was hard for me to think about all the money I spent on my Master’s degree,
only to see it collect dust as I traded in my dress pants and lesson plans for
sweats and Sesame Street. I needed a purpose. What was my calling? I wanted to
be obedient to God.
One evening, through prayer and
meditation, God gave me my purpose and to be honest, He didn’t seem pleased
with my reaction. I felt like our conversation was Him lovingly rebuking me. He
very clearly told me that He had given me two healthy children (I was pregnant
with my daughter, Sadie, at the time) and my job was to raise them to love the
Lord. I am sure He was thinking, “What more do I need to do to get this idea
through your head? I moved you to Cincinnati so you could focus on your family,
but you focused on your agenda. I took away the teaching job so you could put
your energy into Zachary, but still, your eyes were on your plans. That Beech
tree fell on your house and forced you to move and only then did you reluctantly
stay home with my blessing of Zachary and yet you still don’t know your purpose?!”
After that night, I turned my
attitude right around. No longer was I moping around the house, mourning my
former life. While I still have days that are hard, I am able to look at my job
as a mother as true and valuable kingdom work. Amazingly, after I accepted my
role as a mother, the Lord blessed me with more opportunities to serve Him, one
of them being writing this blog for you. I learned that the more obedient I was
to God, the more He entrusted to me. However, there were a few wrong turns I
made and pit falls I fell into that I wanted to share so that you can overcome
and identify these obstacles as you live out your mission.
Recognize Opposition. What’s right is not always what is popular
and this is even truer when it comes to following God. Whenever we do the will
of God, we become a target for evil. Satan doesn’t want us to further God’s
kingdom, so believe me; he is going to do his best to derail us, whether by a
friend, neighbor, family member or situation. Stand firm and know that
following God is far more important than following man. I Peter 3:14 says, “But
even if you should suffer for what is right, you are blessed.”
Pray to be Equipped. When Sadie was a few months old, I was holding her as she lay sleeping peacefully in my arms and reflecting on that day. I was exhausted just reliving it mentally. Both kids had been so demanding that I felt I was running on fumes. I cried out to God that night. I told Him that I knew my job was to raise these two healthy kids but that I was doing a terrible job of it. I was tired and void of joy. I didn’t want Him to make my days any easier, as I recognize that God is not a genie, but I did want Him to equip me for this role He gave me as a parent. This continues to be my daily prayer. Each day brings new challenges so it is vital when carrying out God’s plans that we are seeking Him for guidance. James 1:5 tells us, “If any of you lacks wisdom, he should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to him.” When you ask the Lord for wisdom in your obedience to Him, it gives Him great joy to know that not only do you what to do the task He has given you - but you want to do it well.
Grab a Buddy, a Group and a Mentor. We were created for community.
God has community within the trinity with the Father, the Son and the Holy
Spirit and so it was also necessary for man to have community. Genesis 1:18
states, “It is not good for the man to be alone.” This is true for us all. We
need people to help build us up with encouragement, present us with teachable
moments and sometimes lovingly discipline us when we stray from the path. It is
vital that each of us finds “our person.” This is someone who you can
completely reveal yourself to. This person is someone who keeps you in check. I
have a dear friend from college who loves me so much that she tells me when I
am being a bonehead and encourages me when I am low. Next find a group of
people with similar interests and needs as you. This will allow you to bounce
ideas off each other as well as help you to realize that you are not alone with
what you are facing. As an introvert, this was scary for me, but I took a deep
breath and joined a MOPS group and a young ladies Bible study. These are all
young moms who are on the same path as me and we walk alongside each other in
our trials and joys. I am also in a Supper Club group. This is a group of
friends who just want to spend time together. Our only agenda is community
together. These groups of women encourage each other and by spending time with
them, it enables me to recharge my batteries, making me a better mom. Finally,
find a mentor. Nobody has all the answers, but why not glean the knowledge from
someone who has already walked in our shoes. Find someone who will invest in
you and challenge you in your walk with the Lord and your fulfillment of His
purpose. I like to describe these people as those who ooze wisdom. Don’t feel
strange asking someone to mentor you. They will be impressed with your tenacity
to be a better person and a better mom.
Get in the Word. If you want to seek God and you want to find your
purpose in His plan, you NEED to grab your Bible and read. This part
is not optional. God’s Word is holy and alive and is our owner’s manual for
figuring out how to do life. I read somewhere that because the Bible is God’s
living Word, when you open your Bible, you should expect something to happen. I love that. It certainly makes reading
a whole lot more exciting! Can your latest best seller book say that for
itself? I don’t think so. This is the only Book that is God-breathed[1],
so why wouldn’t we want to get into it and see what He has to say. The
scripture that you read will not only help you overcome everyday obstacles and
help you with the oppositions you will surely face, it will also further
prepare you for the kingdom work you are pursuing as well as delight the Lord.
It’s pretty much a win all around.
Choose Peace. Peace is not sipping a mojito on the beach, listening
to the waves gently crash against the shore. (Though, I wouldn’t mind
participating in that focus group to
find out firsthand.) Peace is a characteristic of the Holy Spirit[2]
and therefore contrary to our human nature. We live in a crazy and chaotic
world. Peace is something we have to choose
because it does not come naturally to us. If it did, the temper tantrums that
my toddler throws would be a cake walk. Choosing peace means that when I am
second guessing everything I am doing as a mom, I understand that God loves my
kids even more than I do and He has got this thing under control. Choose to
believe that truth – God’s got this! Nothing is too big for Him. When you
choose to believe God, you are actively choosing peace. When you actively
choose peace, things will fall into place.
As we conclude our series, I want
to tell you how proud I am of you. I know that some of you actually did your
homework. Some of you are desperately seeking God’s will and my heart rejoices
in knowing that. More importantly, God’s heart rejoices in your desire to be
obedient to Him.
“May the God of peace, who through the blood of the eternal covenant brought back from the dead our Lord Jesus, that great Shepherd of the sheep, equip you with everything good for doing his will, and may he work in us what is pleasing to him, through Jesus Christ, to whom be glory for every and ever. Amen.”Hebrews13:20-21
**Originally written for Emerge Mothers Academy Parenting Class**
[1] 2
Timothy 3:16-17 “All scripture is God-breathed
and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting and training in righteousness,
so that the man of God may be thoroughly equipped for every good work.”
[2]
Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the
Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness,
gentleness and self-control. Against such things there is no law.”
